Unless you have some connect the dots super power, you probably have absolutely no idea what this is supposed to be. But if we zoom out a little, we get this:
Which while still not the greatest picture, might be a little bit more clear with some time and imagination. If we connect the dots, however, we get this little masterpiece:
Which is quite the doozy and not nearly as good as the original, but pretty freaking impressive if you remember that it's a connect the dots puzzle.
So what, you are most certainly asking, does this have to do with any of the opinionated things I'm usually spouting about? Well, just everything.
In some of my late night ponderings, I've come to some conclusions that in hindsight should have been obvious, but because of the way a mind works seemed to be massive revelations instead of common sense.
Living in the lovely situation that I do (aka the dorms of drunkenness), I have the opportunity to observe people in what I like to think of as their natural habitat. The people I live with will, as I've so often heard, be the future of our country. This is a bit terrifying especially when you realize that they're supposed to be learning skills to help them be useful members of society (I can't say with any sort of experience but I feel that might be hard when you're inebriated at least 40% of the week).
But, I also think it goes beyond the current drunkenness of my classmates. Maybe it's because my generation has been spoon-fed and coddled entirely too much to develop the cognitive skills necessary to make connections. Maybe we're just lazy. Whatever the case is, I see a growing trend in peoples' inability to connect various topics and actions to one another.
I could make any number of cases, but I might as well just throw my "John Hancock" out in the open. The trend that I first noticed is the trend between the growing idea of "free love" and the degradation of the family unit. Now, not being hippies, no one actually refers to it as free love anymore, but many have this view that it's their body, their life, and they're not hurting anyone.
I would beg to differ on every single one of those feeble and juvenile defenses, but I think I can make a better case by working the angle of connecting the dots. Right from the beginning you have to realize that I'm starting with a premise that most of society already rejects: that the family is an important--no, vital--unit in society, the building block of human civilization as a whole, instituted and upheld by God.
What makes a family different from other groups of people? Some would say it's biology, but that wouldn't explain marriage relationships or adoption. Families transcend other groups because of the sacrifice necessary to support one.
Being a member of a family means that you are going to give up things that you might want for things that are better. You--no--I will give up my time, I will give up my worldly wealth, I will give up "getting my way" for this little thing called a family. There is a good chance that I will give up traveling the world or buying a fancy car or getting to eat out whenever I want for staying at home and taking care of those dear children that I may someday have the opportunity to be blessed with, making dinner, cleaning up, chauffeuring (but not in a minivan--I do let myself have some dignity), compromising with my husband. These things hold so much more happiness than a career or wealth or fame could ever offer.
So here's what's really bothering me...that great mass that we'll call "society" has the idea that it doesn't matter who you give yourself to. Aside from being detrimental to your health and rather foolish, this very idea undermines the institution of the family. The marriage relationship is not something to be shared by a couple of half-drunk college kids. It's not something to be shared with a stranger met on the street a few hours before. That view removes the importance of a family.
You cannot say on one hand that you want to be married someday and have a family and on the other hand live your life as a selfish person who chases after their lusts with no sense of restraint. That selfishness works against the very epitome of family life and will not lead to any sort of happiness. If you couldn't control yourself before marriage, what difference will it make after a person is married?
Divorce is through the roof, as is the disease that comes from that kind of life. The family is under attack. There are really no other words for it. If we are not living in a way that's preparing us for families then what will those families be like? What will happen to society if the family becomes an antiquated tradition of the past? No one thinks, no one connects the dots. People are too busy being selfish to look past themselves.
I know a lot of the people who read this aren't members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints like I am, but this quote by the apostle Neal A. Maxwell has always meant so much to me:
When the real history of mankind is fully disclosed, will it feature the echoes of gunfire or the shaping sounds of lullabies? The great armistices made by military men or the peacemaking of women in homes and in neighborhoods? Will what happened in cradles and kitchens prove to be more controlling than what happened in congresses? When the surf of the centuries has made the great pyramids so much sand, the everlasting family will be standing, because it is a celestial institution, formed outside of telestial time. The women of God know this.
No wonder the men of God support and sustain you sisters in your unique roles, for the act of deserting home in order to shape society is like thoughtlessly removing crucial fingers from an imperiled dike in order to teach people to swim.What will it be? If a person thinks they can do more in society than they can in their home then there are sadly mistaken. If one thinks that their desires and lusts are more important than the sacrifice of a family and the preparation that that takes then the chance of another broken or dysfunctional home will be that much greater. It's time to start connecting the dots and not just on this subject, but on so many others. I can't walk around blindly and I don't know how anyone else stands to do it. Open your eyes and make an effort because these things are worth fighting for.
I suppose this isn't very upbeat for my first blog post in almost two months, but I'm sure some of you have missed me enough to forgive me. I'll write again before the week's out, so you can always hope. :D
